Chris's Rants

Thursday, July 06, 2006


From Cheers and Jeers @ DKos, we have this classic interpretation of Sen. Steven's explanation for how the Internets work.

The Internets is a series of gerbils, one gerbil for each 'user.' When you 'send' a 'message' (or, in Stevens-speak, 'an internet'), the gerbil takes it down shorthand and scurries through a series of tubes to its destination. The gerbil uploads the message to the inbox (short for 'Internets Box') and then presses the velvet-covered doorbell button. The receiver---say, Senator Stevens---may then safely peruse the porn ad. (Tomorrow we'll explain 'SpamGuard'---we don't want to overwhelm him.)

Sometimes gerbils will stop to have wild gangbang gerbil sex along the way, which can result in delayed internet delivery. Twice a year the telecom companies clean the tubes by flushing them with water and a mild detergent, which also results in slight delays.


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